May is Mental Health Month

May is Mental Health Month, and this year’s theme is “Live Your Life Well”.   The goal is to promote health and wellness in our homes and our lives. I know more than ever, we are all feeling the effects of myriad of challenges, stresses and demands on our lives. We all have stress, and too much stress can drain our ability to feel good, be productive, think and have fun. It’s clear that we have come a long way in understanding and talking about the resources that are available to help us cope and respond to these different challenges. 

Here are a few suggestions from Family Stepping Stones:

• Don’t go it alone.  The giving and receiving of support is one of the best medicines.
• Take time for yourself.  It can be just a few minutes to get things started; but it’s all about you.
• Get enough rest and eat healthy foods for energy & to fight illness.
• Exercise your brain; read, embrace technology, take a class, or work a puzzle.
• Look for the good in people, the news, and the world around you.
• Move your body.  Everything counts; take the stairs, dance around the house, try something new.

Mental Health Reform Is Ready To Go!

The Mental Health Parity Act of 2009

 While National Healthcare Reform is still be debated, MHP is already in place and making a difference for those seeking mental health and substance abuse care, especially when utilizing out-of-network options.

Here are some of the provisions of the new mental health (MHP) law:

• Requires the having the same rules and benefits for mental health as all other medical treatment.
• Mandatory for group health plans of 51 or more employees.
• Forbids employers and insurers from placing stricter limits (for example, higher co-payments or covering fewer doctor’s visits) on mental health care than on other health conditions.
• Applies to out-of-network coverage so that plans that offer out-of-network coverage for medical conditions also must provide out-of-network coverage for mental conditions.
• Individual state parity measures are still in place.

Yes… No… Maybe…

It happens every time.  It sounded like such a good idea 2 weeks ago.  I jumped at the chance… “Sure, I’ll go!”  Now, I have more doubts than excitement.  I can think of so many other things I should probably be doing – maybe I should cancel. What if I don’t fit in; I don’t know them that well.  Wait!  I like these people.  I want to get to know them better.  That’s one of the reasons I wanted to go in the first place. 

Stop it… you’re doing it again.  You are talking yourself out of something that will be good for you.  Ok, take your shower, do your hair, put on the new outfit you bought today.  Just go!  I hate not being home with the kids; it seems like we are so busy all the time – maybe I should call and cancel.  No, I know that I should take time for me too.  I picked up pizza and a movie; they won’t even notice I’m gone.  Just go! 

Maybe I should have asked someone to go with me, and then I wouldn’t have to walk in alone.  Oh please… you are 43 years old; you can walk in the door by yourself.  I’m supposed to be there in less than an hour.  I don’t want to get there first.  Hmmm – I wonder what exactly would be considered fashionably late.  No, that’s a bad idea.  It might be more obvious if I was late – than might be even more obvious.  Just go!

Maybe I should eat first… just a little?  I don’t want to look too hungry or eat just because I’m nervous.  I still need to decide on which shoes to wear….  Oh come on, how hard can this be?  I wonder if everyone else is going through this.  Can we even have a good time if everyone is this stressed out just trying to get there?  Take a breath.  Keep breathing… do that deep breathing that you learned in childbirth class – that usually works.

Ok, I’m here in the parking lot.  Not too early… not too late.  I see someone I know going in right now.  All I have to do is walk in the door.  It can’t be that bad; plus it’s only a few hours.  I can do anything for a few hours. 

“Hi, I’m Penny… how are you?”  “I’m great thanks; I’m glad I could make it.”  “Yes, thank you.  I would love to sit with you.”  “Thanks for inviting me, I had a great time.”

Wow, that was really enjoyable and I felt so comfortable.  What was I thinking?

Holidays Can Stress You Out!

Thanksgiving is only 3 days away.

No way! How did that happen?

I do enjoy the holidays, however I also sometimes feel stressed when the cooking, shopping and activity schedules begin to overshadow the true spirit of the holidays. One of the ways to reduce stress is to create more life balance. Addressing the clutter in your life, your schedule, and your lifestyle choices are a few places to begin. Here are some great ideas for accomplishing some decluttering in your life… just in time for the holidays! Enjoy this Digg article.

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28 Reliable Stress Reducers

We all experience stress.  I was once told that life without stress is death; that’s a reality check for sure.   There is the typical stress of daily living and then there is unexpected stress for which we don’t feel prepared.  When stress begins to overwhelm us, it can take a toll on our health, relationships, and confidence.  This is why simple changes in our personal habits can be effective stress relievers and can begin to create a sense of inner peace and improved physical health.  The full list includes 28 stress reliever that can help you feel less affected by the predictable and unpredictable stress in your life. 

If you need to begin with small steps; here’s my Fav 5!

• Get enough sleep.  If necessary, use an alarm clock to remind you to go to bed.
• Give yourself 15 minutes extra time to get to where you are going; appointments, meetings, airline flights, etc.
• Simplify, simplify, simplify. . .
• Have an optimistic view of the world.  Believe that most people are doing the best they can, most of the time.
• Say “No” to all the extras that you don’t have the time or energy for; everyone needs quiet time to relax.

 Check out all 28…. try a new one each day of the month!       

1.  Get up fifteen minutes earlier; the inevitable morning mishaps will be less stressful.
2. Prepare for the morning the night before; pick out your clothes, make lunches, plan breakfast options.
3. Don’t rely on your memory; write down appointments, library due dates, and dry cleaning pick-up.
4. Make duplicates of all keys; hide house key in a secret spot, carry duplicate car key in your wallet, not your key ring.
5. Procrastination is stressful; what you could do tomorrow, do today; what you want to do today, do it now.
6. It it’s broken get it fixed.  If your alarm clock, wallet, shoe laces, or windshield wipers are a constant aggravation, get them repaired or get new ones.
7. Give yourself 15 minutes extra time to get to where you are going; appointments, meetings, airline flights, etc.
8. Eliminate (or restrict) the amount of caffeine in your diet.
9. Relax your standards.  The world will not end if the grass doesn’t get mowed this weekend.
10. Remember for every one thing that goes wrong, there are probably 10,  50 or 100 things that go right.  Count your blessings.          
11. Ask questions; taking a few minutes to repeat directions, what is expected of you, etc., can save hours.     
12. Say “No”!  Saying “no” to extra projects, social activities, and invitations you know you don’t have the time or energy for takes practice, self-respect, and a belief that everyone, everyday, needs quiet time to relax and be alone.
13. Turn off your phone.  Want to take a long bath, meditate, sleep, or read without interruption?  Find the courage to “disconnect” or just voice mail do its’ job.
14. Turn “needs” into preferences.  Our basic physical needs translate into food, water, and shelter… everything else is a preference.   Don’t get overly attached to preferences.
15. Simplify, simplify, simplify. . .
16. Make friends with non-worriers. Nothing can get you into the habit of worrying faster than associating with chronic worrywarts.
17. Get up and stretch periodically if your job requires that you sit for extended periods.
18. Wear earplugs.  If you need to find quiet at home, pop in some earplugs.
19. Get enough sleep.  If necessary, use an alarm clock to remind you to go to bed.
20. Create order out of chaos.  Organize your home and workspace so that you know exactly where things are. Put things where they belong and you won’t have the stress of losing and searching for things.
21. Writing your thoughts and feelings down in a journal or personal notebook can help you clarify things and give you a renewed perspective.
22. Talk it out.  Discussing your problems with a good friend can help clear your mind of confusion so you canconcentrate on problem solving.
23. Every day, do something you really enjoy.
24. Take a hot bath or shower (or a cool one in summertime) to relieve tension.
25. Focus on understanding rather than on being understood; on loving rather than on being loved.
26. Eliminate destructive self-talk:  “I’m too old to. . .,”  “I’m too fat to. . .,”, “If they knew the real me…”, etc.
27. Have a forgiving view of events and people.  Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world.
28. Have an optimistic view of the world.  Believe that most people are doing the best they can, most of the time.

“They say that time changes things, but actually you have to change them yourself.” Andy Worhol

How Do You Know If You Need Therapy?

• Do you feel like your life is out of control?
• Is your relationship falling apart?
• Do you feel angry or resentful most of the time?
• Are you having trouble feeling motivated?
• Does worrying keep you up at night?
• Does fear keep you from making decisions?
• Are you feeling powerless to change anything?

You don’t have to feel this bad any longer, and you don’t have to go it alone.  You can create change in your life and overcome difficult, even seemingly overwhelming obstacles.

Seeking help is a courageous step.  Let’s work together to explore the possibilities for growth and change that will allow you to start feeling better now.